My kids, my joy…
Its funny the love a mother has for her children.
RIght now, at 9 months pregnant, I have to admit…I’m not the nicest person to be around. As I tell my husband when he asks ‘What’s wrong?’… “I’m annoyed, and I’m annoying!”
I dunno, maybe its just htis stage in pregnancy. Truthfully, its more than that. I’m 9 months pregnant, with a year old and all she briungs, and a 1 1/2 year old and all he brings – also mind you that the whole ‘boy’ thing trips me out. I’m the eldest of 6 girls, and I tell you this..boys and girls are so very different, even at this young age. Anyway, I’m also finishing up my BA online in these accelerated courses at Ashford University, and preparing for a big move out of the country in about 2 months. So, I’m kinda stressed you could say, a new thing for me. I just feel like I have alot on my plate. Oh, and I am TIRED!!!!!
All that means that I’m annoyed and annoying. My kids are just being kids…my boy climbs on the dining room table and puts avocadoes in the Brita, my daughter has ‘accidents’ while trying to change her clothes in front of the toilet. My son sneaks under the gate that is supposed to be keeping him out of the kitchen, my daughter decides to ‘clean’ the window sill by pouring water all over it. Yes, they are just being kids. But you know what, I’m so on edge that it damn near pisses me off. What’s wrong with me?!
Oh, another thing…I’m big, heavy, hot, sweaty, and funky…yeah…not a good combination.
Oh, and I also need to do my hair.
However, through it all, and at the end of the day, I feel bad. I absolutely love my children. They are so sweet. They say, ‘Mommy, I love you!’, they give me unsolicited hugs and kisses, and just looking at them makes me smile. My ‘baby in the belly’ kicks and swims and plays with his brother and sister when they touch my stomach, Mommyhood is beautiful. Being so busy however puts a damper on things. I am excited to finish up with school just so I can chill out a bit. Hang out with my children, and focus on my mommy thing. Spreading myself out so thin is not fun right now, and I feel bad.
Anywho, this is one exciting thing – among many others- about our big move. Hopefully we’ll have a maid, and I should be finished school, and me n my kids can chill. I’m really looking forward to that insha’Allah.
